blah!

how is today going you might ask?

blah!.... blah blah blah blah blah.

but that's ok. we have some fun plans in the works for tomorrow, saturday, and a few more for next week.

I'm trying to figure out how to say goodbye...

(i hate goodbyes...)

reality is starting to set in. there are only 7 more weekdays and 2 more weekends here...

how do i say goodbye to a home that is the only home our kids have known?  a place where we brought home 2 babies! and potty trained 3! a home where 2 of our children learned to walk, 3 learned to open doors and climb on top of counters and even the refrigerator!  a home that has provided us shelter and protection from elements of all kinds physical and spiritual.

how do i say goodbye to friends who have become family, only to leave to a place where i know no-one? friends who have listened to the promptings of the spirit and called or paid a visit precisely when it was needed, or who have given help without being asked?  who have provided great advice, love and devotion to our family?

how do i help our children to say goodbye?  I've been sharing stories and experiences of the times i moved growing up and i think that has helped them... we've been trying to make sure they get a chance to spend last moments with special friends... and getting them excited about a new adventure as a family! they seem happy about that...

so many emotions moving through me that i feel dizzy all the time just trying to figure out what to do next!  I still haven't started the medicine, but on days that i think, yeah, i should start that tomorrow, and then i wake up and  "tomorrow" is great! so then i feel like i can wait another day... i can't decide how much of my "BLAH!" is due to everything else... when i was at a visit with my ob before baby j was born we kind of went over some of the reasons behind depression... new baby, moving, moving to a new state, school change, job change, divorce... brad and i joked that well, except for that last one, we could pretty much check the whole list off... and then we learned of several dear friends and their own divorces or separations in process... so BAM.

So now i have this song in my head... and i think i'll close with that. Hello all!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBZ8ulc5NTg